Created: 14-04-2003
Last update: 01-01-2022

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Katze-centric episode guide 91-105

Ep 91,92 - The Plan to Blow Up the Crescent Base: Completed, The End of the Crescent Base

Following that little setback and Finger's consequent attempt to replace me (HA! and again HA!) I blasted bird-base Crescent Coral into a million itty-bitty pieces. HA! HA! HA! (There was a scary moment when one of the infiltrated subs ran afoul of the birdfaces, but that's what red buttons are for.)

Ep 93 - Counterattack! The Underground Torpedo Plan

Why won't X just believe that the Science Ninja Team is dead? I bombed UN buildings, destroyed ISO factories and had "the Gatcha Team are a bunch of wussies nyaah nyaah nyaah" chalked on every wall - surely if they were alive they would have reacted by now? Oookay, they were a bit slow to react. But did they have to steal that tape? It's not going to be any use to them, but now I have to record the whole thing over again.

Ep 94 - Angler, the Electric Monster

This is one mecha that didn't make it through the testing phase. Firstly, because it ran out of power halfway through its maiden voyage. Secondly, because the waste plant where the director had kindly agreed to let himself be restrained and escorted out of sight while we tanked some energy, turned out to be full of birdies. Thirdly, because instead of roasting like good little birdies should, said birds somehow managed to avoid being incinerated. (A fireproof capsule was being tested in the incinerator, the director says. Now he tells me. And the head bird has the gall to lecture me on how to treat personnel.) Fourthly because, for some inexplicable reason, the mecha exploded just as I'd moved safely out of reach after having planted a bomb at the waste plant by way of post-visit courtesy.

Ep 95 - The Uniting Ninja Magicians

Phew. I left this one to the ninjas (our ninjas, that is). They've been, um, enhanced a bit for closer cooperation, and if they can't splat the ninjabirdies, then I won't be doing myself a favour by hanging around until the end.

Ep 96 - Charge into Galactor Headquarters

Shhh... don't tell anyone... There is no Great Buffalo spirit. I just made it up to lure the birdies into a trap. And what should I see but some redneck with a grudge taking pot shots at them while they're canoeing up the river. Quite accurately, too. Now normally I would greatly appreciate this, but as it is, he's ruining my scheme. Fortunately, there's no bird-bait like a Human In Distress - and being tied up at the bottom of a quickly filling giant water tank fits that bill. I managed to capture three of them and threatened to flog them to death if the others didn't come out. "Here we are!" cried the others and crashed in through the roof. I should've blasted them while they were in the canoe.

Ep 97 - Leona 3, the Spaceship With No Tomorrow

Sweet revenge. Remember a certain capsule the birdies escaped certain death in? It is now making its way towards the plant I locked them into, together with papa Nambu, for Certain Death part II. That the GP then appears and blasts the capsule, while Nambu is in his office again the next morning, I'll attribute to a strange kind of double vision.

Ep 98 - Grape Bomber, the Globular Monstermech

Recipe for success: find a poor sucker who wants to advance socially and scientifically; one of those poor students with a grant. Tell him he's the smartest guy you've ever met. Offer him a job with a fat salary. Let him design a bee-oo-tiful deadly killer mecha. Then gas him.

Ep 99 - Wounded G-2

This time, X himself tried his hand at destroying the ninjabirdies. Using a really smart idea of his, we had them locked into a drill sent downwards on a collision course with the Earth's core. One small oversight: their ship was obviously still manned, because it planted a ticking time bomb under our base. Time for a very speedy evacuation. I have never seen X so pissed off.

Ep 100 - Gatchaman, 20 Years Later

I don't know exactly how much papier-mache and wire netting went into it, but when the decor was finished, I was quite pleased with the imaginary future world under Galactor rule. Especially that statue of me was a nice touch. The head bird's reaction to the actor playing the Swallow (I know 'em all now, hehehe - except for that fat guy who hardly ever shows himself) was agreeably bitter; a pleasant foretaste of the future. But then he sees through the plan because of a... a... metal clip??

Ep 101 - Hebi-Cobra, the Sniper Group

Success. Of sorts. I got the data I was looking for. The fools who collected it were killed by Gatchaman, so I didn't have to bother with giving them promotions. I didn't succeed in killing Gatchaman. But you can't have everything.

Ep 102 - Checkmate Reversal X

One of the worst days in my life, as I am not only unmasked (AGAIN) but publicly exposed and humiliated; for once, I was glad the ninjas had offed all green goons beforehand. And it started out so well; after many days of observing Nambu studying something - studying me, it turned out - I thought I was finally going to get rid of him and the dog who couldn't keep his hands off my mask and any other birdy who happened to pass by. I think I misunderstood what, exactly, X was saying just then, and at any rate wish nothing more than to tear Nambu and his happy gang into tiny, tiny pieces.

Ep 103, 104, 105 - G-2 Risks Death; The Evil Black Hole Operation; Earth's Destruction 0002

Just a few days to go before Operation Black Hole, of which I haven't grasped the finer points yet but which, X has promised me, will more than make up for the unpleasant business at Nambu's mansion. This time, we are going to win. We-are-going-to-WIN. It's that simple. Meanwhile, I've been given permission to amuse myself with the birdies, notably with number two who sensibly uses "Condor" as his professional nickname and has a big 2 painted on the roof of his car. And amusing he was. I've never witnessed so many successful escape attempts in so little time. His body count, as always, was horrendous; his refusal to tell me what I wanted to know, exemplary; his ability to withstand bullets, miraculous. So much for the good stuff. The bad stuff began when his friends came to look for him (wasn't I holding him captive precisely to prevent that?) and I had a moment of deja-vu, or should that be deja-flew, when head bird interrupted my victory speech to toss me around more than I've ever been tossed around before. I pointed out to him that resistance was now futile as the world was in our grasp, he told me that everything was futile as the Black Hole Operation would result in total annihilation, and X showed up to corroborate his claim. What can I say. Guess I did hear right the first time, then. What a sad conclusion to two years of back-breaking hard work and thirty years of preparation. As I hastened my own death a bit, I saw my lack of a life flash by before my eyes. How depressing.

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